Poor White Trash! (Part 1)

Thanks to everybody who took the time to read my first post, and a special thanks to those who commented. I was amazed to receive any comments at all…lol.

My blog name was taken from Aaron Hill's Works, circa 1750, and it simply means:
To tackle a difficult problem boldly.

So yeah, we were a poor family. My dad was out of work a lot more than he was in it and that didn’t make for a happy childhood. It wasn’t just being poor either, from around the age of four I never felt loved, or even liked, by my dad. He was Irish and had a real temper, and he only seemed to care and have time for my brother…you’ll here more about them in future posts.

Anyway, I remember when I was very young (when there was only three children) and dad was working, I couldn’t wait for him to come home from work.
He would pick us up and spin us around, hug and kiss us, throw us up and down, let us sit on his motor bike and just enjoy having his kids around him…he had his temper though and we never knew how long his good mood would last.

We moved to a larger house when I was seven because a year earlier my mum had her fourth child, that’s when things started to get bad. To make matters worse my mum had another child the following year. So now there were five kids to feed, clothe etc and dad wasn’t working.

Maybe I should explain that my dad was a catholic, so he didn’t believe in contraception, he was fourteen years older than my mum and they were both raised to believe that a woman’s place is most definitely in the home…and a wife should never refuse her husband his conjugal rights.

We never went hungry but it was a daily struggle for them to make ends meet, I know they made sacrifices but when you’re a kid you just can’t see it.

So, all our clothes were either hand-me-downs from friends and relatives, or from jumble sales.
It’s bad enough going to school with your friend when you’re wearing the clothes he has grown out of, but my mum used to buy some really ugly stuff at the jumble sales…the ugliest thing was this pair of PURPLE trousers, but that’s not the worst of it, it was the material…CRUSHED VELVET!!!!

Aaaargh!!! Purple crushed fucking velvet…I mean, helloooo!! What were you thinking mum?…lol.

Well, as you can probably imagine, I was mortified at the thought of actually having to wear these to school. Let’s face it: young kids don’t really think before they speak.
But, no matter how much I pleaded or cried (seriously, you would’ve thought I was being murdered with the amount of screaming I was doing…lol), I had to wear them.
I really can’t remember if anybody took the piss at school (but you would though, wouldn’t you!), I think I’ve just blocked out the trauma of it all…lol.

Sorry, this is going on too long, I might have to start splitting posts into part 1, part 2 etc.
I know what I want to say, I just keep going off on tangents though. To me it’s all related, but it probably reads like a mish-mash of verbal diarrhoea to you.

I’ll post part 2 tomorrow.

Yes, I’m also stealing the “Random facts about me” thing, sorry :) and I’m going to add some (hopefully) humorous stuff at the end of each post too.

So, some random stuff:

I hate spiders and moths.

I hate puppets, especially clowns and large birds…they’ve always scared the crap out of me lol.

My first real sexual contact with another male was when I was aged 12.

My last was aged around 35 (yeah, it’s easy to figure out how long I’ve not “had any” for lol).

Finally, some interesting facts (with some humour thrown in for good measure).
I hope it makes you chuckle!

If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.

(Now that's more like it!)

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.

(O.M.G.!)

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.

(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (Creepy.)

(I'm still not over the pig.)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

(Don't try this at home, maybe at work.)

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.

('Honey, I'm home. What the..?!')

The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.
(30 minutes...lucky pig! Can you imagine?)

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.

(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.

(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity.)

Butterflies taste with their feet.

(Something I always wanted to know.)

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.

(Hmmmmmm..)

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.

(okay, so that would be a good thing.)

A cat's urine glows under a black light.

(I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

( I know some people like that.)

Starfish have no brains.

(I know some people like that too.)

Polar bears are left-handed.

(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer.)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

(What about that pig??)